23 Dec 2008, Comments (14)

Are you a member of my family? Take this easy quiz to find out!

Author: Helen

A finished box of cereal or dry biscuits should be:

a) flattened and put in the paper recycling

b) put in the bin

c) returned to the cupboard.

An ice cube tray with only two or three cubes remaining should be:

a) Washed and refilled and returned to the freezer

b) Returned to the freezer- might as well use the remaining two

c) Emptied of the remaining cubes and then returned to the freezer.

Drawers and cupboard doors should be:

a) pushed in neatly

b) Doesn’t matter too much if they’re not 100% in

c) Left dangling way out for that freshly burgled look

Taking the rubbish bins out on bin night, and bringing them back in when empty,

a) Is the man’s job

b) Is a job that can equally well be done by the man or woman

c) Is unnecessary – they trundle in and out by themselves.

Baking sheets, cutlery and saucepans are clean

a) When all hard stains and crusty bits have been scoured off.

b) When all loose food scraps and grease have been washed off.

c) When I say so.

What does your bathroom counter (“vanity”) have on it?

a) A scented candle and a dolly varden toilet roll cover

b) As little as possible

c) Two newspapers, a crime novel, someone’s underpants, T shirt, track pants, assorted rubbish and a battery-powered fish which sings “Proud Mary”

The most suitable bed for a medium-sized dog is

a) A leopard print velour bed

b) A practical sling bed, the kind with legs

c) Ones’ dressing gown.

A kids room should be tidied

a) Daily

b) Weekly

c) Every two years, whether it needs it or not.

Comments (14)

  • Oz Ozzie says:

    All (c). I’m all class 😉

  • Pavlov's Cat says:

    Definitely all c’s. Am I in?

  • Helen says:


    So, can anyone explain the reason for the empty biscuit boxes returned to the cupboard and the empty ice cube trays returned to the freezer? Are they supposed to grow back, or something?

  • Mindy says:

    I’m not, but I suspect my husband may be a long lost relative.

  • I love it.

    “So, can anyone explain the reason for the empty biscuit boxes returned to the cupboard and the empty ice cube trays returned to the freezer? Are they supposed to grow back, or something?”

    No – the recycling and repurchasing fairies, and the ice cube fairy, look after those things. Obviously. 🙂

  • Nabakov says:

    “which sings “Proud Mary””

    It’s that kind of detail that makes for great comedy writing if not good housekeeping.

  • Bernice says:

    I still vividly recall my mother’s rage on discovering “someone” had finished off the dried apricots, closed the packet & returned it to the shelf. Epic in scope, it was one of the rare occasions we were all rendered mute. So “someone” in the my family must be related….

  • TimT says:

    Baking sheets, cutlery and saucepans are clean

    c) When I say so!

    I like to think that everyone who has bulging cupboards, dogs lying on dressing gowns, etc, form a kind of ‘universal family’.There may or may not be a genetic connection. Scientists are working on that one.

  • blue milk says:

    I’m not a member of your family but I think I found my partner’s tribe.

  • Fine says:

    I love those singing fish.

    My Mum refused to tidy my bedroom (quite properly) when I was kid, with the idea that eventually I’d clean it myself. It never worked. I’m still a total useless slag when it comes to housework.

  • Alison says:

    Umm, I may be one of yours.
    One time when my fiancé (then boyfriend) and I were camping, *alone*, I opened the back of the camper-van and his pillow dropped out. I popped it back on the bed: Everything I could think of doing didn’t seem that necessary, at the time. Meh.
    Later that day he found it and asked me “How did this dirt get on my pillow?”
    “Someone must have dropped it.”
    “Someone? What?”

  • L. says:

    Not me — but the rest of my family clearly shares your DNA. And I want that fish.

    Merry Christmas!

  • Helen says:

    I’ll have to hunt down where my sister-in-law bought it…

    She has also bought Exploding Boy a horrible monkey which screams loudly when thrown across the room. Of course this encourages eleven-year-olds to throw it across the room.

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