22 Jul 2004, Comments (0)

What a Downer

Author: Helen

Dolly is shocked and saddened that the ungrateful Timorese people still want their share of the Greater Sunrise natural gas field. After all we’ve done for them! Read what he said, and cringe, fellow Australians.


ALEXANDER DOWNER: The vast majority of the Australian people don’t appreciate the abuse that’s been meted out at Australia after all we’ve done for East Timor, and I don’t think it’s a tactic that will work, and I’ve explained that to the East Timorese, that it’s not a wise tactic.

(Folding hands piously across Buddha-like stomach,)

…You catch more bees with honey than you do with vinegar.

Barf!…As if that little piece of Hallmark Greeting-card wisdom wasn’t embarassing enough, because Australia has refused to accept the jurisdiction of the International Court of Justice, Jose Ramos Horta has suggested bringing in New Zealand as an independent mediator. We were humiliated in the Synchronised Swimming Rugby, and now the Kiwis are being brought in to curb our government’s greedy excesses.

Unfortunately, like so many of his type, Dolly just can’t stop digging himself further into the hole:


ALEXANDER DOWNER: No, Australia has been a proud and independent country for a very long time, and we’re able to look after our own negotiations as we did with the Papua New Guineans, as we did with the New Zealanders themselves, and we can do all of that ourselves.

Yes Dolly, we’re so proud and independent we let the US ambassador, um, provide independent advice to the Australian electorate, and your mob are hellbent on signing a Free Trade Agreement benefiting the United States as well as kowtowing to them on Israel/Palestine (via Back Pages ). As ‘Nabakov’ said (see previous link) we’re a protectorate with good beaches. Or as Chris puts it, an international disgrace.

Never mind, Dolly, you stand up to those Papua new Guineans! However, I have to agree, those Noo Zealanders are damned scary.

(Disclaimer: the Cast Iron Balcony is married to a Noo Zillander.)

Comments (0)

  • Guido says:

    Downer is an idiot. So we had to intervene after the situation became too unbearable and we could not look away anymore. What about the failure of decades of both Labor and Coalition governments kowtowing to the Indonesians. Wasn’t Australia the only country to recognise Timor Leste as part of Indonesia?

    I am sure the Timorese are grateful but they don’t trust Australia with good reason.

    (p.s. a bit of an ad here – my criticism on current ALP policy on East Timor are at here )

  • Sedgwick says:

    My grey-haired (location and extent of which is rarely spoken about, even within the family) granny oft trotted out an old saying which indicated that she’d had enough.

    I think “up to Dolly’s wax” maybe on its way back into common parlance.

  • Helen says:

    Sedge, that comment is just too cryptic for me. Up to Dolly’s wax? You mean, up to her Brazilian…?

  • Sedgwick says:

    Trivia lesson.

    “Hands on heads. Eyes straight ahead.”

    “Stop fidgetting Tiley!”

    Old, probably Victorian era, dolls with cloth bodies and wax heads (hands and feet as well, possibly). When you had had enough to eat it was said (at least by my grisled hirsute granny it was) you were up to dolly’s wax.

    “That’s it! Tiley, go stand in the corner!”

  • David Tiley says:

    And to think you’ve never met me in the flesh, Sedge. How could you know?

    I was beaten for fidgetting while only a tot.

    We had a different version, more to do with food. “Full up to pussy’s bow.”

  • Fadil says:

    Dolly is reassured by American reassuracnes about abuse allegations in Guantanamo Bay! Indeed, well I feel better now. This is really embarassing for a so called independent country. How can any awake person vote for these idiots? Latham may not express himself verbally but he could stand toe to toe with any President or Taxi driver. I don’t think I’ve ever hated anyone more than Downer – even more so than Howard.

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